


Letters From You

by losttinjapan



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/F, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Letters, Sad, Sad Ending, Suicide, Suicide Notes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-09-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:27:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26286424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/losttinjapan/pseuds/losttinjapan
Summary: Jughead Jones finds a shoebox of letters addressed to him from his girlfriend, who had committed suicide a few weeks previous.
Relationships: Jughead Jones/Reader, Jughead Jones/You
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	Letters From You

It's been two weeks. Two whole weeks since the dreaded day Jughead Jones stumbled into his girlfriend's bedroom. When he saw the lifeless body of the girl he had fallen in love with. A container of pills lay next to her on the plush bed covers, and small but noticeable cuts littering both her arms. Jughead's heart broke at the sight in front of him.

A week later they held a memorial in honour of the young Y/n L/n at the school. Her family, friends, boyfriend, and most of the town were in attendance. All of them wanting to pay respects to the girl, who's life ended so soon.

It was especially hard for Jughead to comprehend the fact that his girlfriend, the love of his life and one of his best friends was now gone. There would be no more movie nights together. No more kisses shared between the two of them. And most certainly, no more of her presence by his side. It was like the h/c haired female had disappeared off of the face of the earth. When in reality, she technically did and she took Jughead's heart along with her. 

❤

Jughead moved along the hallway and into Y/n's bedroom. The same bedroom that held many heart-warming memories of the two of them. The boy with the crown beanie, gently closed the door to the room and moved towards the bed. Boxes were now littered around the place, some stacked up high, but most of them held the now deceased girl's belongings. Her parent's were getting rid of it all, getting rid of every trace that they had a daughter. 

Jughead had tears staining his now red cheeks, as he picked up a picture frame off of the nightstand. It was a picture of Y/n and himself together, they were both drinking milkshakes at Pop's while Jughead had his arm around her shoulders. The raven haired male could still remember that day easily, as they had both bright and warm smiles across their faces when Betty had taken it of them. 

A new tear fell onto the frame, as he stared sadly at it. However, he gently placed the photo aside as soon as he spotted a weird box, tucked under the bed. Confused, Jughead quickly made his over way there, bending onto the ground he reached over and pulled it out. Before grabbing it with both hands, and standing up to take a seat on the bed. 

Jughead inspected the box quickly. It was a regular shoebox, except it had his name written messily across the lid in a black marker pen. Curiously, he lifted the lid off of the box before placing it beside himself on the bed. Once the lid was removed, Jughead peeked into the shoebox, spotting three different letters inside. Each one of them numbered from one to three. Jughead picked up the first one labelled '1' and gently slid it out of the envelope it was previously encased in. He then began to read it.

☆

Dear Jughead

If you are reading this now, at all. Then you probably know that I am no longer with you. I have committed suicide, and you are probably wondering why I made that decision. I'll tell you, don't worry. But first, I just wanted to let you know that I will always love you. forever. I'm also sorry that i couldn't be as strong as i should be. And that was entirely my decision, when I couldn't even ignore the reasons behind me wanting to die. 

Now, you deserve that explanation I promised you before. The explanation on why I ended my life. So here it is. 

It all started in the summer when Jason Blossom passed away. I was there at Sweetwater River on July 4th. I was taking a walk along the river's edge when I noticed Jason had left Cheryl by the river and began walking into the forest. So i followed him. I followed him to where he was going. I was curious ok. But my curiosity didn't go unnoticed by Cheryl though, because she saw me. She saw me following him. I didn't realise she saw me then. So i continued walking after Jason, but lost him as soon as i tripped over a tree root. Next thing I knew, i heard a gunshot go off, and i sprinted out of there. 

A few days later, it was the first day back at school and i was walking through the crowded school hallways. Just trying to get to my first class, when I felt someone shove me to the lockers. I then heard people talking, before seeing glares being sent my way from others. They were talking about something on their phones, something that included me.

I was confused about why I was being glared and talked about rudely, but then i realised why. It was because of something Cheryl posted on instagram. A photo of me walking through the trees near Sweetwater River, captioned: 'Why did you follow Jason? So you could kill him?' she then tagged me, and then from that day the rumours began. Rumours that i had killed Jason. which i didn't. Because yes, i was at Sweetwater River and yes, i followed Jason. But I didn't kill him. Those rumours were what started the endless bullying I went through at school.

The next few weeks would go by, and i would still get shoved, tormented, glared at in the halls by other students. It got so bad, where I turned to self harm. At first, it was only one or two cuts on my arms but when the insults and harsh looks I'd receive would continue to pile up I did it more and more. I was honestly surprised , I could keep all the marks from you, Jughead for this long. I guess you were too busy investigating, and working on that novel to notice my pain. 

I was lucky I had so many hoodies and pairs of leggings to hide these cuts. Otherwise I would've gotten a lot more insults, to add to the current ones I was receiving. But that is not what drew me to finally killing myself. No. It was a day or two after Fred Andrews was shot. We had been dating for 3 or 4 months by then. We were at school, and you had just left to head to Southside High. Leaving me to face the horrors of highschool alone. The insults that still didn't fade. 

The morning had soon went by, and i was using the bathroom when it happened. The thing that finally broke me, and drove me to killing myself. I had just exited the bathroom, when I headed over towards my locker. But I stopped in mid walk, when i had my eyes fixed on my locker. It was completely open, my stuff was ripped and thrown across the floor, red--atleast I hoped it was paint was splattered all through out it and a single note with the word: 'Killer' on it.

I could feel tears threatening to spill, but tried to not let them fall as i stared at the mess in front of me. I couldn't let them fall for long, as next thing I know phones went off, and everyone looked at their phones. Everyone, including myself. I wish I hadn't looked it at though, because what i saw was horrible. It left me with nightmares for days. It was a picture uploaded by someone from the football team. A picture that included Jason Blossom getting shot by Clifford. But instead of him, it had a badly photoshopped picture of my face there.

It shouldn't of gotten to me as much as it did. I should've told you and you could've tried to atleast help me get my mind off it. But I didn't, and i felt guilty for it. As now i had left you with a broken heart, that probably isn't possible to be fixed. And that's all because i couldn't control myself from the thoughts of suicide.

× Y/n

☆

Jughead folded the letter back up and placed it back into the box. The boy with the crown beanie couldn't stop the tears from freely flowing from his eyes. He had just learned the real reason behind his girlfriend's suicide. He felt betrayed. Betrayed, because if he had known about the problems in her life then he could've possibly helped her. But he didn't and he feels like beating himself up over the unhappiness of the love of his life. 

Sighing sadly, Jughead quickly pulled out the second letter labelled '2' and like the previous one, he tore open the envelope, unfolded the letter and began to read the words written on it. He was just hoping that this one would be a little better then the last. But knowing they were all suicide notes, a little bit of the hope had died.

☆

Dear Jughead

Jug, I'm sorry again for leaving you alone in this cruel, cruel world. But as you may have already read in the previous letter. Then you know about the reasoning behind why I felt like this was my time to leave the world, leave the world of the harsh and cruel things I have been told. 

As I am writing this second letter for you to find after my passing, I am currently inside of Pop's and right in front of you. You're too focused on writing your novel to notice me writing this. Cause if you did. You'd probably tear it up right away, and try to stop me from committing. 

Anyways, do you remember that time we first met? Like we were both 12 years old at the time. My family had just moved into Riverdale, and we met in the middle school library. I was the shy, new girl who was just looking for a book to read since i hadn't made any friends yet. You were.....the outcast with only like Archie and Betty as friends. I was struggling to reach a book from the top shelf and i guess.. you saw me. So you came over and grabbed it down for me, since you were a bit taller then me. 

I remember just smiling sweetly, and thanking you. Before asking if you wanted to join me at a table in the library together. You said yes. We kept on doing that together for the next few weeks, I'd meet you in the library, we'd sit and read together, sometimes even talk to each other. I slowly opened up to you and our friendship grew rapidly, as we moved from hanging in the library to other places. 

I always loved that memory of our first meeting and had forever cherished it since. Not ever wanting to let it go because I felt like we'd be best friends forever. I don't think our younger selves ever expected for a once purely platonic friendship would blossom into something more, then by sophomore year we'd begin dating.

That brings me to our first kiss. I felt like it was the most magical moment ever. Like it was something out of a movie or tv show. I remembered it like it was yesterday. We were both a week into our relationship and were at the drive-in together. I had my head rested on your shoulder, while your arm was around my shoulder as we watched whatever movie was currently being played at the time. 

Then like a clichè you had given me your jacket, when I felt cold. I remember myself blushing at the compliment you gave me after. You had called me 'cute.' Before we had locked gazes and slowly began leaning in to each other, until there was no remaining space between us two. When both of our lips had collided with each other's it felt like.....as clichè as it sounded....fireworks. 

I always thought then, that i could see myself growing old with you, get married and possibly have a few kids with you. Cause you made me happy. So incredibly happy. Because with you, i always felt like you were my home. But, those stupid rumours and insults got to me. Broke me on the inside. Forced me into self harm, something I got addicted to. Addicted to like a drug. 

I felt like I was unrepairable. Someone that was not able to be fixed, no matter how many kisses you gave me or times you told me, you loved me.

× Y/n

☆

The tears kept tumbling down Jughead's now red cheeks, he was completely bawling now as he shoved the second letter back into the shoebox with the others. He put the lid back on the box, grabbed it and walked back out of Y/n's room. his Y/n's room. Wiping away his tears felt like it was completely useless as they kept coming. So he stopped bothering to do that and headed home to his trailer. As his father, FP probably would be worried about him. 

Walking down the pavement to Sunnyside Trailer Park, his thoughts remained on one topic, and one topic only. His now deceased girlfriend, Y/n L/n. After reading the first two letters written for him, Jug was scared to even open the third and final letter addressed to himself. What if it was something bad? What if....? the constant amount of 'what if' questions swarmed his thoughts, making his head hurt. 

Too busy focused on his own thoughts, the beanie-wearing boy didn't even realise he had arrived home until he was now standing on the porch outside his front door. He quickly snapped out of the thoughts he was so focused on and turned the door knob, and entering the dark room of the trailer. 

He sighed, realising his father wasn't even home then before switching on the lights and walking into his bedroom, closing the door once he had entered. Jughead hesitated at first in reading the final letter, before muttering 'screw it' under his breath and opening the shoebox once more. Right after he had sat comfortably atop his own bed. He gripped his hand over the third and final envelope inside, and repeating the process with the other two he had read previously. He let out another sad sigh, and began to read once again.

☆

Dear Jughead.

This is the final letter I have written for you, and also probably the shortest one I wrote out of the three. Each of these letters I wasn't planning to of written, but i did cause i felt like you deserved some sort of explanation on why I had made my choice of committing suicide. I also felt like I wanted to let you know one last time, how head over heels in love I am for you. How I will always love you for many more years to come, despite myself not physically being by your side. I'll always be in your heart, as your first love, and first girlfriend. 

So I'm what trying to say now is to not let my death to control the rest of your life. But to move on, and find someone else to love like you said, you loved me. You should be happy, that's all I've ever wanted for you, even if it's no longer with me. I'm sure we'll meet again when it's your time to pass on. So please don't do what I had done and join me in death, you atleast still have a whole life ahead of you. 

Once again, move on and find someone else to spend your life with. Forget about me because I will always be watching over you. Just be happy please.

I will love you Jughead Jones, forever and always. <3

×Y/n

☆

Jughead lay the last letter onto the beside table, near him and looked up out of the window, and into starry night sky. His eyes were very red and puffy from the amount of time he had spent crying in the last few hours. He closed his eyes, letting out a deep breath before reopening them. The written words of the last letter flooded into his mind. She wanted him to move on, find someone else and to be happy with even if it wasn't her. 

But one problem, nobody else would be her. Nobody else would be able to make as him happy as he was with her. Because Y/n L/n was his entire world, and the love of his life. So he made a decision in that moment, something that would make him happy, Something that he thought would help him be at peace. Even though she told him not to do it, he didn't care, he didn't want to spend the rest of his life with someone he could never love as much as his first love. He wanted to be at peace with the very person he loves with all his heart. Even if it meant dying to be together.

So with his mind made up, Jug quickly grabbed a scrap of paper from the floor and scribbled out a quick farewell note to his father and his friends. Before grabbing the pill container off of the nightstand and poured the entirety of it, into his mouth. And as soon as the effects kicked in, he fell into a endless void of darkness. Something he wouldn't be waking up from anytime soon. All because he wanted to be with his beloved girlfriend.


End file.
